Creed - One (ne033x personal reflection on life and death)

Hey Friends,

It's odd how little things in life effect us. I want to share an experience that stuck with me, and made a huge impact on my life.

It was about fifteen years ago, and I went with an ex-girlfriend to the cemetary to visit her grandmother's grave.It was a warm summer day, and I was walking around, checking out grave stones. I came across a grave that had no headstone, or any other information about who was buried there. I looked closer and there was a small wooden stake with a simple metal plate nailed to it. On this 2-inch square plate was just numbers - nothing more. This is the first time I'd ever seen a grave without some kind of marker identifying who was buried there.

I stood there just staring at the unmarked grave, my mind racing with questions. Was this a man or a woman? A child? We're they poor? Homeless? Mentally disabled? Did they not have anyone who loved them - remembered them? Did they have a family who didn't know they were dead and buried here? The more questions I had, the more sad I became. Even murderers are afforded a grave marker.

I recall crouching down, and asking God to take this soul in His arms and tell him or her that I remember them. I asked God to forgive whatever wrongs this person may have done. This prayer was probably one of the most sincere and heartfelt prayers of my entire life. BTW: I do believe in God - obviously - BUT I do NOT believe in religeon. There's good in all the major religeons, and I choose to follow a little from them all.

I think what hit me the hardest is my own mortality. At that moment, I came to the cold realization that I could very well end up just a number stamped on a small metal plate. I've been running to or from something most of my life, and to this day, I haven't found what I've been looking for. Or, maybe I did and just haven't realized it yet?

I have to be honest, it really bothered me that I could die and it was as if I was never here. And, I really think that motivated me to at least try to leave a piece of me behind in whatever way that I could. I don't even  desire to be famous. I just feel I have to leave behind something that would reflect my heart and soul to at least one person in this world. So, I started painting, writing poetry, wrote a couple books, and of course, my music videos. Not all of my videos are from the heart, but many are, and I truly put a lot into them. I'm not looking to make money, but to relay some positive message. I have to admit, that a few videos even trip me out as far as a message I'm trying to share. I pray about how i should put it all together, and it all just comes together! And, I'm using my biggest passions - music, photography, art, and often a positive message.

Anyways, I've never shared completely this story, but I think it's important. Maybe there's something you want to leave behind? For someone?

Big love,
ne033x